Category: Lifestyle

None of us enters a marriage thinking that there would ever be a reason for divorce. It is usually something that happens to someone else but not to you and your partner. However, in life nothing is certain and some relationships are not built to last, and if you come face to face with the possibility of divorce, don’t panic, you are not the only one. In most developed countries divorce rates are actually increasing and they are reaching a 50% divorce rate. There are several things you can do to make the process less stressful for both you and your partner, and this is especially important if there are kids involved.

You can never be prepared for what is coming

You can think you are. You went over everything, agreed this is the only solution and began the whole process. That is the part of rational thinking, however, emotions are a whole other thing. You start talking about what’s next, from living arrangements to finances and assets splitting. In an ideal world, this would go perfectly, but we are emotional beings and so more often than not even the perfect agreements about all of the above-mentioned issues go down the drain. Now in order to avoid the messy part of the whole process, professionals like family law experts in Sydney, can help settle disputes and mediate the whole proceeding. That way you can have someone to rely on to help you go through this uncomfortable process.

It is OK to mourn

You need to give yourself time to deal with what is happening. You have invested time and emotions into this relationship, there are a lot of memories that bind you, some beautiful some maybe not as much, but still, you have shared your life with this person and it is not an easy thing to get over. So it is important that you give yourself time to be sad about what has happened and in a sense mourn your marriage. Going forward without dealing with all the emotions is definitely not the best options, because sooner or later you need to deal with them, and sooner is always better. And if you feel overwhelmed turning to a professional is always advisable, as a therapist might be able to help you understand the situation better and provide you with the right emotional tools to deal with the whole thing.

Don’t let others define you

Most people feel ashamed when they have to admit they are going through a divorce. They feel like failures even though they know all too well that there is nothing to be embarrassed about. They have done their best to save the marriage and it simply wasn’t meant to be. So now it is time to deal with the questions and the silent judgment. Well, first of all, you are not in any obligation to explain your situation to anyone. It is no one’s business but yours and your partner’s. So simply politely decline to answer all the why’s and how’s. You will feel a lot better, that is a given. Next, don’t put a label on yourself, your relationship status shouldn’t be divorced, it should be single. You don’t have to advertise, just tell it to people if you want to. Going through something as traumatic as a divorce should be a personal journey and you don’t have the obligation to share it with anyone you don’t want to. Remember that. People sometimes feel like they have the right to demand answers from you, but they don’t.

Don’t play the blame game

When something monumental happens in our life and divorce is as monumental as it can get, make no mistake, we tend to look for someone and something to blame or thank for it. So even an amicable divorce can turn ugly if you start putting the blame for things on one another. And you are going to get asked about it a lot, people always assume one person is to blame more than the other in situations like this. But as always it takes two to make or break something. So instead of looking for someone to blame try to develop a good relationship with your ex. After all, they are bound to have some characteristics you love, otherwise, you wouldn’t have married them. So focus on that, be cordial and move on. Stooping down to a blame game can be damaging for both of you.

Don’t expect divorce to be easy, even under the best circumstances. When we get married we feel like we are binding our life to another’s, and it is a really big deal. So now having to detach from that, and sand alone once again can be quite scary, but at the same time, if that is what you feel is the best for both of you then embrace it and find your way back to yourself and your independence.

Selling your home can be a daunting task, especially when you have children. It is not easy to make sure your home is ready at all times for potential buyers. Here are a few suggestions to make it easier on yourself and your children.

Make it a Family Affair

Moving can be difficult for children. They might not want to leave their friends and can be anxious about getting used to a new school.

Talk to them about the move and help them work through their fears and concerns. Enlist their help in preparing for the move, including keeping the house neat and clean. They will find some comfort when you make them feel like they are part of a family decision and planning for a significant event like moving.

How much understanding and help much you can expect from your children will depend upon their age. If your children are very young, you are going to have to deal with the messes they create such as:

• Crayons or paint on the walls
• Dirt and mud from their shoes on your floors and carpeting
• Chocolate and other food stains on counters, furniture, and walls

If you explain to them the importance of trying to keep the house as clean as possible, you might have less cleaning up to do on a daily basis.

Get Rid of Clutter

Nothing makes a house look worse than clutter. This mean all the extra stuff you have hanging around your home. The last thing you want to do is drag your junk from one house to another. If it is broken, you don’t use it, or you don’t need it, get rid of it.

When you have children, you are going to have a lot more stuff lying around the house including their toys, bicycles, and other play things.

Your children’s fun things are the last items you want to store away because you don’t want them to feel like they are being deprived. However, it is perfectly reasonable to put away or store things they might not be using.

If your house is on the market during the winter, their bikes, pails, shovels, and baby pools won’t be missed until the weather gets warm again. They also won’t miss their sleds and ice skates during the summer if that is when you are selling your house.

Out of season items are not just for your children. Think about all those bulky winter clothes, boots, holiday decorations, skis, snowboards, skates, hockey gear, and snow tires that are taking up space in your closets, basement, and garage.

A helpful option is to rent a full-service storage unit where you can store some of these things. As this full storage provider, an alternative to the typical self-storage, operating out of Seattle says:

“If winter is your favorite season and storing away all these items is a sad move for you, don’t worry, they will only be away till the next year! For now, they are getting in the way of your clutter-free living”.

By storing these winter items in a safe place and out of the home you are trying to sell, you will be amazed at how much neater and less cluttered your home will look and feel to potential buyers.

Restrict Visiting Hours

Most realtors will tell you that you have to be available any time a potential buyer wants to view your home. For the most part, this is a true statement.

However, some people have found that it is much less stressful to ask for 24 hours-notice before a showing. They have also found that it is less disruptive to their children’s lives and schedules if they have a cut-off time such as when it is time for their children to go to sleep.

This is a decision you will have to make with your realtor or on your own if you are not using a realtor. It might extend the length of time your house is on the market if you limit when you will show your home. Look at the pros and cons and make the best decision for your specific situation.

Hire a Professional Cleaner

No matter how you try to keep your house clean, it will benefit you to hire a professional to do a deep cleaning.

There will always be dust build-up in hard to reach places and corners you might not be getting to on a regular basis. Even though it costs more money to hire someone to do the cleaning than if you were to do it yourself, it is a wise decision when you have children.

You will be giving yourself less stress and more quality time to spend with your children instead of wasting your valuable time cleaning and picking up after them.

There is no getting away from the fact that selling your home will be stressful. You can only do your best to make it easier by following some of the above suggestions. Remember that your children’s well-being is more important than a few toys or a little dirt on the floor.

Try not to get stressed over the little things and enjoy your children while they are young. You and your children will be better for it when you finally do move into your new home.

For all the moms who have getting rid of that old mattress at the bottom of their priority list….

Find the next destination of the old mattress sitting in the basement collecting dust. Based on the condition of your mattress, we will help you decide if it should be recycled or donated – never dumped.

For all the moms out there itching to do some spring cleaning, you’re going to want to read this.

Have you ever wondered what to do with your old mattress? Maybe your kid’s old twin beds have been sitting in the basement for the last five years. Or perhaps, you’ve had a teenager leaving for college and you are stuck with their old furniture. How inconvenient.

Getting rid of a mattress is probably at the bottom of your priority list. Why? Because it’s a hassle. Who wants to lug an 80 lb bed through the house? You have more important things to think about.

For an item purchased every 7 to 10 years, it’s not surprising people have no clue how to get rid of it when it reaches the end of its life. The general assumption is to leave it on the curb for your city’s bulk waste pickup to deal with. Unfortunately, that’s illegal in most places.

That’s why we are giving you two easy steps for moving that old, lumpy mattress out of your house and onto bigger and better things (than rotting in the basement).

Step 1: Assess the condition of your mattress

If the mattress you are getting rid of belonging to a child, chances are it has a few rips or stains. If that’s the case, you’ll want to recycle your mattress. There are laws against donating mattresses in poor condition. This is for the health and safety of the next owners of your old bed.

However, if the mattress is stain free and appears to have no major rips or tears, that’s great! Consider donating your mattress to a family in need. You might even consider your own family member or friend that needs a new bed.

Step 2: Identify a charity or organization in your area that will take your mattress

Here’s the thing. Mattresses are 85% recyclable. That’s why you should avoid sending your mattress to the dump at all costs.

Thirty-three million mattresses are manufactured every year in the United States and 20 million are dumped. That’s a lot of mattresses to go in a landfill.

Based on the condition of the mattress, you should either find locations to recycle near you or call the local charity in your area to see if they accept mattress donations. It’s important to note, laws regarding reselling mattresses vary from county to county. While one branch of a charity may accept your mattress, another may not. All you have to do is make a few calls.

Regardless of whether you donate or recycle, the good news is most organizations will come to pick up your mattress for you! All you have to do is open the door.

Both of these options are just as simple as taking your old, lumpy mattress to the dump – not to mention, it’s better for the planet. And if you’re not in love with either, yard sale season is in full swing!

Once your old mattress is gone, find the next best mattress to replace it!

Happy cleaning.